Greetings and Salutations, Friends of Playboy! It’s time to start the week out on the right foot, and if the shoe fits, we’ll start one sock at a time. That’s a lot of foot talk for so early on a Monday. I apologize.
Anyway, we began things around these parts today by checking out some furniture made to look, feel, and even smell like human skin. Nothing brightens up a home like a Ted Bundy-esque recliner and ottoman set. We, naturally, wanted to try our hand at this “art,” so we had our girls model some hot-girl furniture like the hat rack with a rack and rear end table.
After that, we ran through a couple of Good Naked/Bad Naked stories. We re-enacted a story about a bunch of drunk naked dudes stealing burger meat in the dead of night, and did not re-enact a story of a couple who got arrested for getting it on in the middle of the day on a crowded public beach. Our models were pretty disappointed they didn’t get the chance to take a swing at that one.
Following the theatrical part of our show, we talked via Skype with Amazon Amanda, a fetish model who gets paid by men to sit on them. At 6’3”, 285 lbs. that’s a lotta woman. She gave us a short tutorial on her techniques, and the phrase “different strokes for different folks” definitely rang true.
After a quick break, we gave our hot models a little quiz on their knowledge of squash and face-sitting positions in an Amazon-themed “Position Impossible.” These are your day-to-day sexual positions, and our girls went a whopping 0 for 3. Must not be their style.
Finally, we welcomed in Currie Graham, Brando Eaton, and Mitch Ryan from the new film “Cabin Fever: Patient Zero,” and played a round of “Playboy Feud” with the guys as patients, and our ladies as naughty nurses. In this head-to-head round we tied and ran out of time, but we’d like to take this opportunity to remind you to get yourself a check-up. Because you never know if your nurse will be hot, until you try.